"Clearing the way for new efforts, Transformation, Loss, Alteration, Permanant scar on mind, Beginning of new era..."

When it comes down to it... the Death card really represents change more than anything else... this in mind, I think it's the ideal card to represent my life.

I suppose you could call this page a cross between a Rant fest and a journal... a place where you can read about all the stuff that's on my mind and how things are going, plus any mindless drivel I can think of.

Oh yeah.. though it seems slightly out of place I'll also use this page to list trivia about what's going on around me as I write this since it'll be the most updated section. (Just because I like to be a bit different...)

February Twenty-First, Nineteen Hundred Ninety-Nine

You ever look at the wreck your life has become and think to yourself "things can't get much worse"... only to realize you weren't even close?

If so, you might have an idea how my life's been lately. ;-p

Okay, let's list the things that have gone wrong in 1999 so far:

1- I realized the relationship I had with my roommate wasn't working out and was forced to deal with that.

2- I had to quit my crap job because my supervisor was sexually harassing me.

3- My roommate lost his job the same day.

4- I make friends with a guy who turned scary obsessive on me.

5- My brother found out he had Cancer.

6- My roommate made me tell him exactly why I wouldn't take him back... which has to be one of the hardest things I've evrer done.

7- My life seemed to get a bit better when I started dating my bestest friend out here

a guy who's not only sweet, funny, charming, kind, interesting, thoughtful, and extremely attractive, but is also an AMAZINGLY gifted kisser. I realize I'm wrong, however, when my roommate tells me he can't handle seeing me with someone else and I need to find somewhere else to live.

That brings me up to about two days ago, since then, I've dispersed my belongings among various friends and have taken temporary residence at a friend's place.

So essentially I'm currently unemployed, practically homeless, without a dollar to my name, sleeping on someone's couch, and you know something?

I feel pretty darn good.

The way I look at things, I'm pretty lucky. I have friends here that really care about me and are willing to help me out in big ways. I'm dating an incredible person who makes me feel immesurably happy just by being near him, leaves me weak kneed with every kiss, and wants to go as slow as I do. Less than an hour after I was told to go I had a place to stay. If you really think about it, I'm doing better than I could have, and I'm very fortunate, indeed.

Besides... staying here could beconsidered something of an upgrade.

Two words:



Trivial Little Update Credits....

The music that helped influence the creation of this site:

I've been listening to lots of perky stuff lately, Men Without Hats, Space, Oingo Boingo, Legendary Pink Dots, stuff to bounce by. =] (I blame it on the fact that Andrew (my boi) is as big a perky as I am... if not more so!! =]

The movies that burned the VCR:

I watched Austin Powers Friday!!! Also Armitage III. =]

The foodstuffs that fueled me:

Hee hee hee.. Jell - O Plus. ;-) Cranberry Raspberry Jell - O made with vodka. Also some pizza (ham with mushroom.. mushrooms yanked off), orange juice, Coke, and uhm.. a chicken sandwitch earlier. =]

What am I wearing at the moment I'm typing all this garbage?

A long white brocade dress and my lucky turtle ring. =]

And the litle refinements?

Sinful lippie in Sultry Flame, Jane nailie in Devlish and some generic nude shadow.

The Books I've Been Reading:

"My Sergei", by Ekaterina Gordeava

I still can't believe people read this stuff ;-)