Ghosts, Paul Weller

Okay... I know this will sound even stranger than most stuff I toss out, but to be perfectly frank, this was probably the song most responsible for my actual involvement in the Goth scene.

Why is that so bizzarre?

Because The Jam was a late seventies, early eighties Mod revival band and well.. just not very Goth. Not even close.

I love them anyway. Nyah!

I was flipping through my closet one day, trying to figure out if I should wear the lacy black slipdress or the simple red flowered sudress.

The inner dialogue went something like this..

"Hmm... black.. pretty. Very pretty. Almost sexy. No, not almost, very sexy. Would go great with my four inch plats and leather bracelets. Fishnets would be a nice touch."

"Oh, but then mom will get upset. You know she likes you to wear bright colors. Besides, you don't want to make the others uncomfortable, do you? You *should* manage to look fairly normal."

"True, but oh! I really want to wear the pretty black one.. why can't i just do what I want?"

(The cd player does random play right into "Ghosts" as I stand in front of the mirror holding the black dress in front of me... I actually *listen* to the words...)

::stage whisper::

"Holy shit... I've been fucking lying to myself for years. Bring on the Siouxsie... I think I've finally come home."

::red flowery dres promptly tossed onto couch and left there as I pu on my pretty pretty black dress, painted my nails a nice pewter color, and applied eyeilner::

(Okay, so maybe it doesn't seem that mindblowing to you but I guess that you'd have had to experience it to understand... or at least know me a little better...)

Why are you frightened - can't you see that it's you

That ain't no ghost - it's a reflection of you

Why do you turn away - an' keep it out of sight

Oh - don't live up to your given roles

There's more inside you that you won't show

But you keep it hidden just like everyone

You're scared to show you care - it'll make you vulnerable

So you wear that ghost around you for disguise

But there's no need just 'cos it's all we've known

There's more inside you that you haven't shown

So keep on moving, moving, moving your feet

Keep on shuf-shuf-shuffling to this ghost dance beat

Just keep on walking down never ending streets

One day you'll walk right out of this life

And then you'll wonder why you didn't try

To spread some loving all around

Old fashioned causes like that still stand

Gotta rid this prejudice that ties you down

How do you feel at the end of the day

Just like you've walked over your own grave

So why are you frightened - can't you see that it's you

At the moment there's nothing - so there's nothing to lose

Lift up your lonely heart and walk right on through