The Boiler

Writen By Joyce, Leyton, J. Summers, N. Summers, Rhoda Dakar, Barker, and Owens

Okay.. there are obviously a LOT of songs that touch me, but very few bring me soobbing hysterically to tears.

This one did more than that the first time I heard it.

The first time I heard this song was oin my room late at night in almost complete darkness about a week and a half after my 19th birthday.

It had been over two years since I'd been raped and I still hadn't admitted it to myself.

Anyway...

I was lying there in bed listening to a tape that my new boyfriend{1} had given me on our first date. He'd made me a mix tape of various Ska songs because I'd told him that I wasn't too familiar with it.

I had just listened to "Ghost Town" by the Specials (which I still rate as one of my favorite songs EVER) when I heard this very eerie warbling coming from the speakers... a saxaphone sounding like a cat screeching.. and then a woman speaking rhythmically to a hypnotic beat.

After you read the lyrics...

I think you'll understand why I ended up screaming hystericallly on the floor oin a fetal position crying over what I'd lost so long before.

I know a lot of people who say it's sick that I listen to this song fairly often...

... I call it cathartic.

{1}Yes.. the infamous exfiance



I went out walking last Saturday

I was getting some gear

And this guy offered to pay

"Who's the hun?"

I think to myself

For so many years I've been left on the shelf

An old boiler

And then we went walking

Back down the high street

And I felt really proud

'cause he looked so neat

He was a real hard man,

Tough as they come

He said I was cool but,

I still felt like

An old boiler

He bid me come out

How could I say no?

He said "Meet me at eight,

'round at my place, you know?"

With my new gear on and a blow dried hairdo

But in my mind I knew

I was still

An old boiler

We danced all night long

To a nice steady beat

But my hair went to frizz in the terrible heat

My mascara ran and so did my tights

Confirming in my sight

I must be

An old boiler

So we came out this club

Hot and sweaty

'cause we'd been dancing all night

And he says to me

"Well babe, what you doing then?"

"Well, I think I might get a cab"

I said casuallly

"Oh no, no, come back to my place, I only live just 'round the corner, you can go home in the mornin' y'hear?"

"Well, I don't think so. I mean, I've only known you a day, it's a bit soon, isn't it? Gimme a ring sometime, yeah?"

But then he start to get mad

"Listen 'ere, Girl. I bouoght that gear you got on, I paid you in here tonight bought you all them drinks and now you wanna go home I should've been feedin' you cocoa"

And then he stormed off

Well I felt alll right like,

Well you would, wouldn't you?

So I ran after him

Caught him up

There we are walking down the street 'bout

Hundred mile per hour

Arm in arm

No talking

Atmosphere you coulda' cut with a knife

There was no one about

Nothin to take your mind off it you know?

No cars, not even the occasional stray animal

It was cold and

The winds whistling through the trees

Blowin newspapers against me legs so I tripped as I tried to keep up with him

There was all of these alleyways and railway bridges

Stink of piss

Then all of a sudden

He grabbed hold of my arm

And he start dragging me up one of these alleyways

And he starts hittin me reallly hard against the face you know?

He was hittin' me

And grabbin' at me

And it was awful 'cause he was so big

Hittin' me he was

And tearin' at my clothes And there was nothing I could do I was helpless

And then

HE TRIED TO RAPE ME

And there was nothing I could do

So all I could do was scream

NOOOOOOOO!

NOO!

LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!

NOOOOO!!

NOOOOOO!!!!

NOOOO!!!

PLEASE STOP!!!

NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

(assorted screams, cries, and finallly, a sound resembling someone vomitting)